I try to blog about major things going on in my life. So I am going to blog about this because I feel like it is affecting my creativity. I mention in here when I feel like I am a bit manic. It's been a long time since I have mentioned that I feel a bit depressed because it's been so long since I have felt depressed. But the last week or two I have been feeling and seeing the signs that the real scary depression is creeping back in. Now I don't wanna get all scared because it is only a feeling and it is really about what I do with it but, it is also about some pretty scary thoughts that I get. But I talked to my doctor today and she changed my bipolar meds and I called the lady I talk to and she will call me back. I called her just to "touch base". So I am getting all my ducks in a row in case the BIG SCARY happens and I start to lose my way.
It's effecting my shops and my art in that I am not doing anything except going through email and blogging and I am not doing anything creative. I am not even listing. This watch that is waiting to be listed is sitting looking at me from my desktop. But I am not beating myself up. It has been almost 2 years to the month that I have had a swing down so I feel blessed and this might be a small burp. I sure hope someone is reading this that can relate. Can anyone relate? Is anyone out there? Can you write in the comments section? Can you let me know?
Helen
It's effecting my shops and my art in that I am not doing anything except going through email and blogging and I am not doing anything creative. I am not even listing. This watch that is waiting to be listed is sitting looking at me from my desktop. But I am not beating myself up. It has been almost 2 years to the month that I have had a swing down so I feel blessed and this might be a small burp. I sure hope someone is reading this that can relate. Can anyone relate? Is anyone out there? Can you write in the comments section? Can you let me know?
Helen
I know exactly what you are going through. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder right before my 21st birthday. I’ve been living with it for 10 years now. I was lucky enough the last couple of years to have only little spouts of depression; it was like I forgot I had it. Unfortunately the last couple of months have been really tough. I have been really depressed, I keep trying to push forward but I have gotten to a point where I know I need to get back into therapy. I have a lot of family things going on right now that are triggering my depression and mania. I need to learn how to deal with that situation because it is making me feel worse.
ReplyDeleteI also can understand the absence of creativity. I am usually overflowing with ideas and the last couple of weeks I can’t think of anything. I have decided to take a little break. I end up getting frustrated with myself and getting more depressed. I have thrown myself into doing spring cleaning, yard work, and spending time with my kids.
Trust me you are not alone. I hope you feel better soon. Heather
Thank you Heather for your kind words of empathy. I hope you, too, feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteI do not have problems with being bipolar, but stress can slow me down in being creative. I find that getting out from my usual surroundings and being active, such as walking, exercise, etc. helps. Please continue to work on this with your doctor, and I will pray that you get over this "bump" in your life, and that you will soon feel better. {{{hugs}}} Claudia
ReplyDeleteClaudia,
ReplyDeleteWhat a kind person you are! Yes I am exercising about 5 times a week doing cardio and weight lifting. I am on a cancer medicine that made me gain weight rapidly and alot. So I have stopped gaining and I am losing finally with all the working out. I am trying to stay motivated to work out...your words help. Thank you so much,
Helen